How to Receive a Compliment

We live in a world where we are constantly fishing for compliments (aka Social Media). We post a picture that we are super proud of and we check our notifications a hundred times, to see how many “likes” & “comments” we receive. Then, we dissect the post even more...who liked it, who didn’t?! 

I know, I know, it’s a sad world.

Think about it...some people in your life are consistently complimenting you and others in life, never will. This I haven’t figured out yet, but stick with me, this might be a new blog topic in a few weeks.

The ones that write on your picture, are also the ones that would most likely express the same thoughts to your face, as well. Let’s keep focusing on these amazing people and let’s call them our “friends”. 

So when a “friend” compliments you on social media, we have time to react and respond with a genuine reply. But what about an in-person compliment, how do you react?

We are taught from a very young age to be humble, confident and never come across as conceited or arrogant.  

In my professional opinion (Dr. Katie here…), there are 2 different types of compliment receivers:

#1 Receiver:

These are the people who might say thank you, but they complete their response with the thousand reasons why the compliment can’t be true.  Which in turn, makes the “friend” feel bad for even complimenting them at all. 

Example(s):

Friend: Oh my gosh, I love your shirt!
Receiver: Seriously?!, This old thing?  I bought it 100 years ago, for like $2.

Friend: You look so cute today! 
Receiver: Are you kidding me?!  I barely have makeup on today and I feel 100 lbs. overweight.

Friend: You rocked your presentation today, nicely done!
Receiver: Really?! No way! I messed up so much. Did you hear me stutter a million times? 

Receiver #2

These are the people you compliment and you promise yourself, NEVER to do that again. I’m pretty sure they were absent or goofing off the day we were taught as children, about being humble and not arrogant. 

Example(s):

Friend: I love your shirt!
Receiver: I love it too!

Friend: You look so cute today. 
Receiver: I know, right?! 

Friend: You rocked your presentation today, nicely done!
Receiver: You’re right, I totally nailed it!

Eek!  Not good, right?! 

The truth is, we all are either a Receiver #1 or Receiver #2 and we can put our friends and family in each of these categories as well.  Even though, one Receiver seems a little harsher vs. the other, they are both bad. 

It takes a very special person to compliment and acknowledge someone for physical appearances, hard work well done, talent, athletic performances, etc.  More people think to themselves or talk to others about their thoughts, but very few express the positive feelings, that they feel towards that person. So for the few that do, we need to reward them with a positive response. 

So after this long explanation, here is the short and sweet version of what we as a receiver SHOULD say, with the most genuine emotion. 

“Thank you so much, that is so sweet!”

(Then zip your mouth and throw away the key!!)

Psst: Kind words cost nothing, so spread them around like crazy! Oh, and you just might want to share this article, so your "friends" know how to receive your compliments too! 

-Katie Lak
Owner

www.Lolligagin.com